The Beginning of This Blog, and Some Why’s, Who’s, and How To Submit

Hi everyone,

This information is just copied from my profile, but since I am asking for submissions, I want to make sure everyone sees it! Sorry the formatting is so boring – that’s gonna change as I figure this wordpress thing out!


1) Why

2) Who I am and some notes about what I think

3) Who should submit posts and who should not at this time

4) WHAT to submit

5) HOW to submit and PRIVACY policy

ONE: Why

I’m bisexual and I’m sick to death of having my experiences erased in straight and gay communities.

One day, I got fed up and wrote a facebook post about my experiences.

Within minutes, the public and private outpouring of support, as a result of said post, exploded into much, MUCH more than I expected. I had long realized that there wasn’t really a “bi / pan / not-straight-not-gay” community, at least where I am, but prior to writing publicly, I was just frustrated, and felt as though I couldn’t be helpful to anyone, much less myself, in this situation.

But the letters, gchats, private messages, and comments that flooded in changed that perception. I realized: we may not have many safe spaces to come together, but we exist. Many of us are still stuck in the closet and do not wish to be. Many of us feel trapped. Many of us are in pain. Many of us long for each other. This isn’t a community – yet – but it IS the building blocks of one.

Literally because of all the messages from bi/pan/queer people, in the closet and out of it, I decided to launch this blog. It’s an attempt to use our stories in order to create community, solidarity, support, and the knowledge, for each other, that we in fact exist.

I started the day just wanting to get some shit off my chest. What I got was a sense of something much larger. This blog isn’t everything, but it’s something, and after not feeling that I had anything to contribute in this realm for so long, it is a wonderful something given to me, by a community which was silenced where I live, and all of a sudden reared it’s head and BELLOWED.

TWO: Me + some notes

I’m cis, female bodied and gendered, and I really id sexuality-wise more as “I don’t care” but I still claim the “bi” label because I think it’s still useful, and people tend to understand what it is.

My use of the term “bi” should NOT be taken to mean that I am some kind of pro-gender binary person – I think binarism is crap, AND I want to be easily understood. This is the balance that I, personally, have found – NOT a reflection that I believe in only two genders, or that everyone HAS a gender.

Also, because of who I am, my posts and probably this blog will reflect who I am – ie, probably, at times, it will lean toward female, cis experiences, which are NOT AT ALL the only experiences that represent bi people, or that I value. ALL that I am posting about is my experience. If you have a different experience, I don’t want to write about yours – I want YOU to write about it, and send me a post, or a link to your post! You will do it better than I would, promise. And I NEED you to write about your life, because I can’t do it, and I need to learn from you and your words, and so does the world.

THREE: Who should submit

This blog is open to post submissions by ALL people, regardless of gender or gender identity, who id as: bisexual, pansexual, queer of a variety that does not only like one gender of person, “not-straight-not-gay”, “in between,” “I like everybody,” etc. If I have forgotten your label, but the shoe fits, write in. If you haven’t seen a story that sounds like you, WRITE IN! Please!

There will probably be a time when I accept submissions from allies. But at this time, I am not accepting submissions from allies, because people who are not attracted to only one gender have so little space in straight or gay spaces, that I want to take some time and claim what space I / we can for ourselves, to breathe. Occasionally I may solicit posts from allies, but I’m not accepting those kinds of submissions at this time.

FOUR: What to submit

Submissions can include the following:

– Stories / essays / bloggy-type posts
– Poems
– One liners
– A photo or visual work that “says it all”
– An audio sample, but be prepared to provide tech help for me to actually get it up on the blog. Please provide a transcript for the hearing impaired.
– Interviews, but if they are audio / video, please provide a transcript for the hearing impaired.
– Did you write a good related post somewhere else? Send me the link.
– Did I forget something cool? Send me a proposal

ALL SUBMISSIONS MUST BE ORIGINAL. NO EXCEPTIONS. If you saw something cool that you think I should link to, feel free to end me an e-mail with the authors contact info, and I will be in touch with them. Thanks!

Translation: Please feel free to submit posts you have written, which were originally written in a language other than english. I ask that you translate your submission to english for this blog, and I am happy to link to the original.

In general, I do not edit posts much, except for spelling.

FIVE: How to submit, and privacy policy

Please send submissions via e-mail to:

Subject Line: WE EXIST submission

Write: “Use my name: XXX XXXX”
OR: “Use my pseudonym: XXXXX”
OR: “I want my post to be anonymous”

If you also have a blog you wish me to link to, please include that link also.


I will never, ever, ever reveal your private information. If you want to be anonymous or use a pseudonym, that’s how you will be credited on your submission.

Please do not include information you do not want to be made public with your submission. Submit what you want the world to read. This is the internet – people read it.

I will always put “anonymous” where people want to be anonymous. However, I can’t be responsible if someone identifies you based on the contents of your post. Please consider what you write carefully.

I will never confirm or deny someone’s identity.

Final Chapter: THE BEGINNING

What began out of frustration, anger, and silence has become a journey, for me, to help create what I see now can become a community in which we are safer. Where we exist. Where we are seen, and included, and counted, and valued. Where there is a place for me, for us.

I don’t know any more than anyone else. I hope I help someone. You all help me more than you know.

I am excited to see where this goes.

Let’s get to it, shall we?





2 responses to “The Beginning of This Blog, and Some Why’s, Who’s, and How To Submit

  1. Lauren Gartenlaub

    Thanks for doing this CHa-Cha and if you need technical help feel free to contact me

  2. Thanks Lauren! I will probably need to take you up on that.

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